When you have children and separate from your ex, there are ways you must still coordinate your schedule and life with one another. This can be difficult to do given how your marriage ended, as cooperating with an you’ve drifted from or have argued with one too many times isn’t exactly a walk in the park.
However, as a parent you’ve vowed to cherish your children since the day you found out you’d be welcoming your firstborn. That commitment to love and care for your children unconditionally remains intact. But you may struggle to communicate about parental responsibilities with someone after you’ve officially broken up with them.
Fortunately, there are ways you can still work together for the sake of your children:
- Try parallel parenting: You don’t have to be in regular contact with your ex-spouse or be in the same room for child-related events. Rather, you can opt for a parenting style that allows minimal contact between one another. Through parallel parenting you can make your own rules for your children to follow in your household without having to consult your ex. You can also handle child drop-offs and pick-ups on a strict schedule to reduce contact.
- Use apps to communicate: Instead of meeting in-person or speaking on the phone with your ex, you can coordinate using email, online calendars or other digital apps. There are co-parent apps designed to allow parents who take care of their children in separate homes to manage child-related schedules, finances and messages all in one place.
- Seek outside help: The fact of the matter is you aren’t the first person to go through a divorce. Maybe you don’t have anyone close to you that you can bounce co-parenting ideas off of, but there are support groups or therapists that can help talk you through the challenges of divorce. Even learning tips and tricks for being the bigger person can go a long way when an ex seems nearly impossible to be around.
You might try your best and still have co-parenting or custody issues that are negatively impacting your whole family. But a family law attorney can help you decide if it’s time you head back to court.